Develop The One You Accept

Probably wondering, what is this guy doing in the picture? Well, he seems he's got issues with his roof and he's trying to fix it. He loves his home, right? Big time yes.

 

Develop The One You Accept

So hie, I have been meaning to say something pertaining to what I shared a couple of days ago. I remember saying it is important that we embrace our seasons or risk missing it. The right season comes with right things in it including a person. The season might breathe you a person who would require your effort to bring out the best out of them. Now I further said, you can only bring out the best out of the person you have if you accept them for who and what they are. Coz people we  transform in a place of belonging.

May I take it from here: we are all looking for the right person and I said yes the right person exists not anywhere else but in the right season. I want to dissect a bit the term right person. You are the one who has the picture of how your right person looks like, the right person exists in your head. When you tell God to give you the right person; in the right season for you, God does not give you the right person, He gives you the right candidate. A candidate is someone who is up for learning, someone who is up for transformation, someone who is up for development. To say, God does not give you the full picture just like how you have it in mind. But He does give you a person with the core abilities that you need and core abilities that will help him or her become what you picture them to be when you press the button in them. Hear me, God gives you a candidate whose teacher is you. Now if you’re not up to teach, transform or develop the person you have, well you will get frustrated. You will get disappointed if all you expect is a finished product. A person is different from say asking for a car from God, a car will come exactly as you picture it. But for a person, the right person / relationship is built upon a connection. You connect in the moments you share your strengths, weaknesses, victories, failures, tears, joy and so many other of you. The connection is a process and that connection it’s not God who is supposed to build it for you. It’s not God who will date or marry that person, you will and thus, God has to have you be the one to connect with that person personally.


Now the point worth mentioning is: the person God will bring you might be part of what you want or totally not like the picture you want. Either way, it’s okay because God might not give you what you want but He will surely give you what you need. I ask you again, what do you want? How do you want it? When do you want it? Where do you want it and why do you want it? The why will tell if what you’re  wanting is a want or need. It’s okay if God does not give you what you want but does give you what you need. The problem will be when you are not aware of your need because you’re likely to think the person you have met is not him or her.


If it’s God, God will you give you the person you need with the ability in him or her to be reciprocally transformed into what you want. If she’s chubby, well suggest work outs with her. If he sucks at dressing, well suggest your preferred outfit to him. Am saying, your person will definitely have at least an area of weakness. He or she may realise the weakness or you are the one who recognises it. Now, when you notice your friend is wrong, don’t assume your friend is always aware that they are wrong or aware they are not good at that particular thing. I have been there being told things I did not do so well and I was like, really I do that? These are things that even myself I was not aware I do and am bad at them, it took someone to point it out to me. Remember, relationships expose the things you are good at and bad at.

Expect to be told you are bad at some things, don’t be proud to defend yourself. Unless otherwise, your partner will not correct you to devalue you. If you are the right candidate, you won’t feel attacked everytime your partner corrects you. You will further ask how you can be better at it. That’s my next point: if your house has a leaking roof like the man in the picture, you don’t go tell your house “hey house you have a leaking roof, figure out how you gonna fix yourself”, no, you yourself you fix it I believe. 

Am saying, when you notice your friend has not done so well at something, don’t point it out to them if you don’t have an idea how to help them. You are not correcting him or her if you only point the things they are bad at. Help him or her see what things they can do rather than help them with magnification see what they cannot do. Understand this: whenever you have been graced to see something wrong in a person, you are as well graced with at least a solution to that weakness. Please don’t point out the weakness, if you haven’t figured out how you are a strength to their weakness. You will end up heaping them with their wrongs if you do, and nobody would like that. Nobody would like to feel they just can't get anything right.

All am saying is, the person you have can be developed into what you want and that demands you to see the wrong and help him or her get better at it. He or she won’t be developed if you can only point the wrong without being the solution to it. It’s a matter of investment, be able to release your grace unto him or her in the things he or she is weak at. You got a role to play towards the development of your person buddy. When we meet each other, come on, we all meet as a work in progress to each other. We ain't there yet, but if we accepted each other for who and what we are, then yeah we are getting there. Am not promising that we will fully get there, no, a person is a lot to know.

In relationships, we continually walk the journey; we continually get to know each other, we continually get to correct each other, we continually get better for each other.