The Will of Love 1

 

The Will of Love

"People don't grow old together without the desire to grow old together."

Written on 29 June 2021; before this day say yeah I was having a pretty good talk with this friend as to why relationships end the way they do. And I was like coz love is a choice, you decide. “Huh? Do you have to decide to love someone?” She inquired. So, the thinking that she had and most of us have is that love just happens on its own, you meet someone and encounter this thrilling moment and booom you sense love flowing in you. Wow, that’s beautiful but you got to understand that something in the background works out what you sense actually. And the working out is based on your experiences of course, what you have heard, read or seen somewhere and all that builds a base on which the working out happens and you finally be like, “Oh my God, am in love” Awww! But if you sit down and trace the source of your sense, you will find out that it’s all because of your choices; the choice of what you hear, read or see. It’s about the choice of what you feed yourself with which when blended together produces what you sense. It starts way back before you even know it.

Now, falling in love is way easy, though I don’t encourage you to for a reason I told you sometime back; it’s not healthy. So, I will love to use the verb; getting in love is easy but staying/being in it is way demanding. Okay, now sensing the sense that you are in love is way easy right and because we don’t understand that that sense is a decision, it becomes hard to be in love when we realise what decisions the decision we made is demanding. The good thing is that those who recognise their choices before they even choose the love sense and actually getting ahead with it, find it easier to respond to the demands of the choice made.

The issue is, relationships end the way they do because of the recognition of the choice we make. Those who understand the choice they made either stay in it or get out of it. What’s the difference? Those who choose to stay in the choice they made understand and gladly accept their responsibility to supply the demand of their choice. And those who choose to get out of the choice they made as well understand that they are not ready to supply the demand of their choice and the best way is to stay out of it.

Now, when am saying relationships and love I don’t want you to understand this with the usual definitions, okay. Let’s use these definitions: relationship am talking about your connection with someone or something. So am not merely addressing a plain relationship as in boyfriend or girlfriend but as well as marriage, family, friendship, workmates, schoolmates, etc and even God-man connection, importantly. I want you to see it beyond what you normally attach to the word relationship. As for love, love is something for nothing to something. Let me simply define it like that, love is something. I just love this.

The existence of any relationship that exists on earth is determined by how you supply its demand. And for every relationship to be, love has to be there. There’s a scenario in the bible where Jesus first asked about the existence of love before developing or say extending the relationship he wanted with the church. Love keeps the relationship breathing. And we are saying love is a choice, it’s a decision because love is outside feelings. You can agree with me that a relationship is dynamic emotionally, one time it’s awesome and the next second it’s annoying. Thinking using emotions; such relationship gradually dies, it gradually ceases to be supplied for. To sustain it, there’s a need for something that is not shaken at all by the turn out of emotions at the moment, love. Love does not exist because of how you are feeling, it is there whether you feeling awesome or not. 

That’s why Sir Wanangwa Chirwa emphasizes on the principle of commitment. Commit yourself to that relationship if you want to sustain it, quit thinking using your feelings. Instead let love that knows how to commit rule in you. And guess what happens, love emits those awesome feelings in the cold. Understand this, love emits feelings, it’s not feelings that emit love. That’s why we are saying commit yourself to it and see a building feeling that would exist out of what you thought was out of place. Do you know why God still loves you even when you mess up? Do you know why He still holds back His wrath when He's angry? Coz of what love emits in him. Love is His name and nature, He's always living in the awesome emotions. When He's feeling like you are so disobedient and He should just give up on you, His nature quickly covers Him and suppresses His anger saying "God, relax man, relaaax", and He's like am going to die for their sins and make them right with me. He comes and His own creation denies and insults Him, and all He does is smile and say I forgive you for you know not what you are doing. And He goes ahead saying, I will not dwell among you but now I will dwell in you and we shall be one. Awww I love this God.

Listen, commitment does not just happen, you choose to. You choose to let love have its way. You choose to love the person whether you feeling okay or not. You choose to build the relationship. God chose to love us before we loved Him and He still does, you hear me and despite how many times we hurt Him pushing Him away, He stays right there!!! committed to loving us. For He so loved us, He gave his only son. Love gives. Quit loving with an expectation of what you gonna get out of it, your love should be pumping in it. God is committed. And as for you and I, a commandment of love is given to us, love, love and love. Love God with your everything; come on, loving God just doesn’t happen, it takes you choosing to love Him, to give yourself to Him, to commit yourself to Him, to prioritise Him, to do what He wants you to. You choose to say God I will obey you even when I don’t feel like it in me. In the same way, God extended this principle to our surrounding, He said, Love your neighbour as yourself. The prerequisite to loving yourself is loving God and the prerequisite to loving that partner, that colleague, that child, that country, that church, that deed is loving yourself. Listen, you choose to love yourself, it’s a decision to value yourself, to appreciate your make, to be happy, to be the best. Your choice with God reflects in you and the choice with yourself reflects in how you relate with others.

Love is a decision, it has been given to us freely but we choose to walk in it. God commands you and I to love but He doesn't force you to, YOU CHOOSE to love even when He totally owns you. You have a choice, it's not an automatic thing, NO, you tune yourself into the frequency.

You choose to supply a substance that would turn the nothing of that relationship  to something you can proudly point out to, Love❤️. God wants you a healthy relationship you know💪💪

#It is a daily choice